Friday, July 30, 2010

I dont mind being wrong

The other day I made a slight blunder on-air.

I was talking about a new book I'm reading called Humility: True Greatness. Its a risky little book - and I didn't see it coming. It was recommended to me by a friend, so I just picked it up and started reading. Looking back, I should have contemplated the title for more than 2.5 seconds.

Now, about 4 chapters in, I'm thinking: "Why on earth did I start reading this? Now I'm aware! I can't plead ignorance anymore!"

The book (so-far) proposes that we've all learned how to act humble in front of others, but we lack true humility. I can understand this. If someone compliments me, I'm well aware that the appropriate social reaction is to blush and say "aw, shucks" and kick the dirt.

But true humility? The kind that causes me to honestly assess my sinfulness in light of His holiness? The kind that demands I lay down every ounce of my pride and sit still at the foot of the cross? This is a humility I need to learn more about.

Like I said, this book is a little too much right now. Care to read it with me? ;-)

Back to my blunder on-air. I was sharing about this book, and at the end, I remarked that it was by author "C.J. Mahoney."

(insert sound of a game show buzzer) WRONG.

His name is C.J. Mahaney. Do you hear the vowel difference?

Now, I know that doesn't seem like a big deal, but let me share with you a little-known-fact about being on the radio.

People LOVE to correct me.

As in, I honestly believe, some people sit by the radio and wait for me to make a mistake, and then press their speed dial so quickly that the phone literally blinks in the studio before I have a chance to finish a traffic report.

I share this with you with a slight smile on my face, because I've learned to deal with it and it doesn't really bother me.... that much.

So as soon as I said "C.J. Mahoney" and the microphone shut off, Tom looked at me and we both began to giggle and look at the phone lines, waiting for our stampede of correctors to come through with flying colors.

I was especially excited to be corrected about reading a book on humility... especially because that would imply the correcter was familiar with C.J. Mahaney and thus familiar with his work, perhaps even the book on humility. ;-) Do you see my delicious irony?

My point is this: I'm learning to live more and more in grace. More and more in giving the benefit of the doubt. The more I'm corrected, the less I want to correct others.

So, I extend an invitation to you:

Grace Community Church is hosting a Women's Friendship Dessert on Wednesday, August 25th. It begins at 6:30 pm.

The theme is Embrace your Grace, and I've been asked to speak. I'm thrilled - as these type of events are my favorite to do. Because instead of sitting in a studio and talking to you through a microphone, we get to see each other face-to-face.

And I love the theme: Embrace Your Grace. To me, this has always meant embracing my full story; allowing God to use the tougher parts of my life to reveal His love. I'll be sharing a few personal stories as well as how I try to live this out day to day.

Did I mention theres a chocolate fountain there?

And that tickets are only $7.00? And they're available online!

Grab a girlfriend or two. I'll see you there.


"To live by grace means to acknowledge my whole life story, the light side and the dark. In admitting my shadow side I learn who I am and what God's grace means."
— Brennan Manning

Monday, July 19, 2010

I Remember It Well

The following is an actual email that I just sent my parents:

Hey Mom, Hey Kevin...

One upon a time, I was a little girl, probably six.

You guys took me to Baskin Robbins, and I asked to have a sundae in a "helmet cup."

You guys said "No, you wont even remember that plastic cup in a couple of days."

I cried.

Now is your chance to make it up to me... as they have them again. Don't screw up this opportunity.


Thursday, July 1, 2010

Unexpected Company

Ding dong.

I faintly hear the doorbell as I'm upstairs, changing from work clothes to home clothes. Exhausted after another typical day, I can hardly wait to take my contacts out, put my glasses on, and throw my hair into a ponytail.

And sit down.

Ding dong.

Then I vaguely remember Joel saying "....oh hey, my dad might be stopping by."

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad to see him. I love when Kenny visits, we always have a good time. Its just that from the second I heard that doorbell, I was instantly aware of my messy ponytail, my messy clothes, and my messy house.

Down the stairs I flew, opened the front door and invited him in.

"Hey Kenny! Don't mind all these shoes here in the entry way. Just step over them."

In my head, I pictured myself as a flight attendant on the airlines. To our left, you'll notice cereal bowls stacked in the sink. To our right? Fisher-Price has exploded in our living room.

"Granddaddy!" Olivia smiles.

"Hey, Dad." says Joel from the computer.

I shove things out of the way so Kenny can actually take a seat on the couch.

How long has it been since I've cleaned the downstairs bathroom? Man, I hope he doesn't need to use it. Is there even toilet paper in there?

I want to shout out "Kenny, I’m so sorry! This house is a mess! I promise I’m a good wife to your son and a good mother to your granddaughter. Things are just a little chaotic right now!"

Instead, I sheepishly say: "Please excuse our mess."

And then came my favorite part: Kenny paused and smiled at me. So sincerely! He reminded me so much of Joel when he chose his words carefully and lovingly. He said he hardly noticed the clutter. He said it actually made him glad - and reminded him of when all his children were little.

"Really," I asked. "Your house looked like this?"

"For years." And then his face turned a little more serious. "The only reason its clean now is because its just me."

I thought about that for a minute as Kenny and Joel started chatting. Olivia was putting together a puzzle. I fought the urge to start picking things up. Instead, I just sat.

My father-in-law feels welcome in my messy house. He is kind to me amidst my chaos. I honestly believe he doesn't even hold it against me! He knows we have a busy life; he wasn't coming over to check-in on the status of our cleanliness. He's not an inspector, he's my dad. And, lets just call a spade a spade here...He was coming over to see that precious curly haired granddaughter of his. I'm no fool.

As Joel and Kenny kept talking, my mind wandered. I thought about Jesus, and the fact that he feels welcome in my messy life. He is kind to me amidst my chaos. He does not hold it against me. He doesn't check-in on the state of my cleanliness. He is not an inspector. He simply comes (knocks) to spend time with me.

I'm learning to not be afraid of the doorbell.